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Good Swinging Etiquette
RELAX and GET ACQUAINTED
When at a swing party, you are there to have the best of times and to
share the uninhibited enjoyment associated with those who have
discovered a new dimension in their lifestyles. Once you have become
familiar with the surroundings and staff members or host/hostess, y to
become as at ease as you would be at any other social gathering. Don't
hesitate to introduce yourselves to other people. You'll find them eager
to welcome you and to help you blend into their circle of sincere
camaraderie.
SOME TIPS ON ETIQUETTE
While you are advised to be congenial and outgoing, don't be "pushy".
Many couples who are new to "swinging" often have unrealistic
expectations and are not prepared to handle rejections that may
sometimes occur. Freshly showered, perfumed, and neatly dressed people
make more contacts. Don't let your personal physical idiosyncrasies stop
you from having a good time. No one is perfect [although it is common
for new "swingers" to see others as more attractive or more verbal as
themselves]. Don't let your own mind be your worst enemy. Be prepared to
handle rejection but don't take it personally. It is important to
remember that
JOIN THE CONVERSATION
Some people will probably "break the ice" by introducing themselves,
along with other couples they know. It's their way of making you feel at
home. Feel free to join their conversation and you'll find that most of
them will be happy to answer any questions you may have about the
"swinging" lifestyle. Be open and honest. Tell them that you are new to
"swinging" and you'll discover how helpful people can be.
ETIQUETTE IN SWINGING
(Common Sense and Social Courtesy)
All of us want to be successful as swingers. It doesn't matter how
often, with whom, where, or in what style we swing. One of the nicest
things about our lifestyle is that most of us relate to each other with
understanding, thoughtfulness, and common courtesy; just as we ourselves
wish to be treated. Think C.S.A.S.C. (Common Sense and Social Courtesy).
If you employ the following suggestions or adapt them to your own
situation, you should become a welcome participant.
1. BE COURTEOUS
Be aware that this is a lifestyle full of insecurities, uncertainties
and fears. Courteously is how we all want to be treated - with kindness,
thoughtfulness, understanding and sensitivity. In essence, courtesy is
our eating people the way we ourselves want to be treated. Remember the
Golden and Silver rules.
2. BE FRIENDLY
Whether or not you are personally interested in swinging with someone,
be polite. You never know, you may share many other interests
or you may meet that person again, and they may introduce you to someone
with whom you ARE compatible and do wish to share time.
3. CLEANLINESS
Nothing turns a person off faster and more effectively than an unclean
body or un-fresh breath. Even if you shower and perfume yourself
before you leave home, it is always a good idea to freshen up again when
you arrive at your destination. It is amazing what time to drive
somewhere, stop for a bite, or whatever, can do or rather UNDO.
4. RESPECT OTHERS' FEELINGS
Beware, not everyone is comfortable in all situations, Keep your eyes
open for signs that your partner, as well as others, is relaxed and
enjoying themselves. If someone is not comfortable, y helping them over
the rough spots. Remember, you were a beginner once yourself. If it is
obvious that things are not working out, remain polite and courteous;
but alert the host. Keep in mind that not all people feel the same about
things.
5. DON'T BE PUSHY
If you are interested in swinging with someone, let them know in an
inviting way; if they are interested, they will respond positively. If
they are not and say "No, thank you," do not ask WHY. No amount of sweet
talk or coercion on your part will change their mind and will probably
work against you. Everyone has the right to say "NO" at all times, to
anyone, without explanation. Do not ever forget that.
6. ONLY DO WHAT IS FUN FOR YOU
Do not allow yourself to become sexually involved with anybody that you
are not interested in. There is no reason to involve yourself in a scene
that you are not comfortable with. You are in the lifestyle to enjoy
yourself, so only do what you want, when you want and with whom you
want.
7. HOW AND WHY TO SAY NO
One of the basic etiquette in swinging is the right of anyone to say
"No". Experience has taught most people that everybody is not right for
everybody else. Improper handling of a situation, however, can lead to a
lot of hurt or very bad feelings. The swing world accepts the premise
that everyone has the right to say "No" to anyone at anytime and it
should be done with a simple "No, thank you". Never give an explanation,
because that is what usually causes the problems and the pain.
8. ALCOHOL OR DRUGS
Most of us do not use drugs, although some of us drink socially. At
times, a few drinks are nice to help you "relax". Overindulging may
hamper your physical abilities, as well as offend or turn other people
off to you. If you have to over indulge in order to participate in
swinging, you are involved in the wrong lifestyle.
9. PRACTICE SAFER SEX
It is up to us to protect ourselves as well as our partners. With the
present concern over sexually transmitted diseases such as syphilis,
gonorrhoea, aids, yeast infection, etc., the use of condoms should not
offend anybody. Anyone not willing to take this precaution is acting
selfishly and irresponsibly. You are not being accused of being unclean,
but simply someone wishes to provide you both with protection.
10. ENJOY YOURSELF
Most important, have a good time, act out your fantasies, explore your
own sexuality and enjoy everything
this lifestyle has to offer with enthusiasm, laughter and a positive
attitude